Dear S****

Dear S,

I still hoping for you. I still have feeling for you. I thought we're over, but when I visit your page, you get me back.

I am not giving up for you. I will still waiting for you, even it will takes 12 months for now. I was stupid for letting you go, just because I was not confident with myself.

S,

You still haunting me. The thought of you just burn the desire inside of me. It was still there. And maybe will always stay here in my heart.

I hope we will reunite one day. I've got the strong feeling, you'll be mine, I'll be yours one fine day. I will come back for you and you will look out for me. I believe.

S, please, accept me sooner. InshaaAllah.

P/s - Thank you Allah for giving me strength, hope, perspective, energy when I needed it the most. I am fine now. I feel a lot better. I am now ready to kick ass in this world.

Goodnight!

The ultimate beauty

Wanita yang solehah (baik) itu lebih baik daripada 1,000 lelaki yang soleh.

I pernah teringat ustazah pernah cakap pasal wanita solehah. Salah satunya ayat kat atas ni. Dan ayat ni makes me thinking and wonder....

Mungkin ada kebenarannya. For woman, to be solehah, it is tough, but not impossible. Senang tapi susah. Bila kita baca buku agama pasal ciri-ciri wanita solehah, terasa kerdil sangat diri.  I am far far away from being a good muslimah. Dalam fahaman barat, kita dah rasa dah cukup baik sebagai seorang wanita. Guess what? It takes more than that. Astagfirullahalazim...

Takut

Pernah tak kadang-kadang, kita rasa takut. Takut masa depan. Takut siksaan pada hari kiamat. Takut tak cukup duit. Takut tak kahwin. Takut tak dapat capai cita-cita. Takut nikmat ditarik. Takut suami / kekasih cari yang lain. Takut kehilangan kasih sayang family. Etc. I have all those fear. Semuanya I takut. Sampai pernah I tak nak buat apa-apa sebab risau sangat masa depan.

The truth is, nothing is guarantee in this world. NOTHING. Hanya janji Allah yang pasti. Itupun dengan kuasa dan kehendak-Nya.

Kita tak tahu masa depan. Semua orang tak tahu. Jadi, kenapa waste time worry about them? Berdoa dan berserah pada Allah adalah yang terbaik. Be positive.

Kadang-kadang hati tak tenang, sebab I think too much, worry too much. I should not. Redha. Berserah. Tiba-tiba teringat ayah pernah pesan, jadi orang Islam ni indah. Sebab apa yang berlaku adalah qada dan qadar Nya. Ayah was right.

I still have so much to learn. So much... Bertapa jahilnya diri ni...

This is just a reminder for me. I feel sad. These few days, I had done deep thinking. Away from work and life routine.

Dunia memang nikmat. Tapi akhirat yang abadi. Are we prepared for this?

Goodnight.

2012! Wrap up!

2012 is nearly end. Looking back, I feel like wow, Alhamdullilah, for the life I lived. Like every year, I will write back the summary of the year at the end of the year. So, I can always look back in this little journal of mine, of what I had gone through.

1. Biggest change in my life - wear a tudung. It is the best thing ever happen. I never expect it this soon. And I always feel glad and blessed. :)

Hey, it's me! Lol

2. Had a time of my life in my career. Successful marketing campaign, not so successful campaign, events, ICC, Preve' launching, incentive trip, meeting with director, ceo and other big bosses, bla, bla, bla.

My ICC Team for this year!

One of my marketing campaign

3. Had a chance to go to Phuket - thanks to my big boss who choosing me to go and I feel he appreciate my hardwork. (cewah, konon!)

Somewhere in Phuket Island

4. Minor surgery on my right ear due to sinus.

Painful Experience

5. Grow love for cats and have 3 of them as pet! Still scared of them but I started to love cats even more now. They are just a cute creature!

Bean(gold), Milo(black&white) & Koko(3 color kitty)

6. Watching how the company change the management. It is really a good life experience. It makes me think deeper about life. Memang betul, hidup umpama roda.

7. Family holiday to Sabah - I am as the organizer who takes care of everything except for the money. My mum is the main sponsor.

Mama & all of us

My old folks!

8. Won lucky draw to Hello Kitty Town for 4 pax. I was mistaken it was a Legoland before. Like duh! And the sibling love it so much!

Sorry Nedi, I only have 4 tickets and I love you anyway.

9. Resign from Proton. Move to other industry that have been my aim in career, InshaaAllah.

10. Make new bestfriend, grow friendship at former workplace, met wonderful people there, met inspiring ordinary people and be a part of their life.

During buka puasa

My favorite people in Proton

11. Learn to cook. I am not afraid of boiling oil anymore. I can remember the recipe or even create new one. Dah pandai agak penggunaan bawang. Haha.

Bolehlaaa...

12. Attending weddings! Although I missed out quite a lot of my friend's wedding.

My 'neighbour' in MRSM Taiping

Best buddies in Proton

13. Still going strong with the partner, InshaaAllah. Hopefully, one day, we will be a husband and wife. :)

That's it. Wrap up of 2012. There are still long way to go for life. Wait up 2013. I have tons to do for you.


Have a nice day!

Bye Proton Edar

In life, every beginning has it ends. And the end of something is a mark of new beginning.

The truth is, I am sad leaving my former workplace. Yesterday is my last day, and I only feel the emotion this morning. I was not feeling well yesterday, thus, I don't really say goodbye to the colleagues.

I will miss everything there.

Bistro - the cafeteria

My office building - which is standing proud

My bosses

My colleagues

Everything.

While I feel like I am not making a wise decision,  my boss said something meaningful to me. "Allah yang gerakkan hati hang untuk pergi dari sini."

I believe that. 

2012 is towards the end. Let embrace 2013 with new kind of confidence. Semoga penghijaran ini akan membawa kepada lebih kebaikan.

Amin.

Thank you all for the warm wishes

My Boss

It is sad.... But I am leaving the company soon. Will get into details later. However, my boss said something funny this morning.

"Naz, you last day bila? Boleh tak you buat last project before you go. Kesian kat orang baru."
"Hmm... Ok boss."
While my colleague, "Boss, siapa replacement? Boss dah cari ke?"
"I nak cari yang pakai skirt."
"Kat depan tu ada gak yang pakai skirt boss."
"Tu dah aging, dah tua. Aku tak mau."

Bahaha. I will definately miss my boss. He is like a cheeky and funny uncle to me. :)

Cheers!

Sabah Holiday!

So, the whole family went to Sabah last weekend. I must say, it was so far, the best family vacation ever! We did everything there, from seing mount kinabalu peak to snorkling at the crystal clear beach and shopping in the city! Kota Kinabalu is the place to be (gaya promote boleh kerja dengan tourism ministry tak?). Hehe.

Day 1 - Arrive at KKIA - Kundasang
We took first flight at 7.30 am and arrive there around 10.30 am. Then, our cousin who stay in KK fetch us and we had lunch at his home. After that, the journey to Kundasang begin! Lucky there is GPS, so driving there is not that tough. Tapi jalan berbukit lah. Macam nak pergi cameron. But it is all worth it when we reached Kundasang. It is a very small 'cowboy' town.

First MAS experience to my lil sisters and brother

 

We stay at J.Residence. Oh my, memang best lah! Cuaca sejuk sangat. I do not put on any make up on my face during our stay there sebab memang tak berminyak langsung! Kita orang sampai dalm pukul 3.30 pm. Check in and terus baring sambil menikmati udara sejuk gitu. Petang tu, all of us had our dinner at the local restaurant there. Sebelum tu, apa lagi, bergambar sakan dengan background gunung kinabalu. Pekan ni kecil sangat, cuma ada satu stesyen minyak shell kundasang. penat cari sebab dia bawah bukit dan operation hours from 7 am - 6 pm.

The shower is facing the forest. How cool is that!

Day 2 - Kundasang - KK
The next morning, we all woke up early to watch the sun rise. Too bad, we went out a little late and the sun is already rise when we reached Kundasang. The best place to watch sun rise is at Ranau, about 5km from Kundasang. Anyway, we still enjoy the view. :) After that we had our breakfast.

Sunrise and breakfast facing Mount Kinabalu

 

The next stop is Desa Dairy Farm. Best giler ok. Maybe sebab my expectation is low, so bila experience best kat sana, rasa best sangat. Lembu diorang sangat comel and the view is like new zealand. The best experience is feeding the cattle (baby cow and baby goat). I feel like feeding a cute teddy bear. Bulu diorang bersih sangat!

Moo....NZ la sangat kan!

 

Lepas tu, kitaorang pergi Kundasang memorial war. Like again, my expectation is low. Tapi bila dah masuk, oh my, cantik sangat. They have gardens full of flowers and the landscape is just as beautiful and nice. Before balik hotel, we stop by at Kinabalu Park, where the first stop for Mount Kinabalu climber.

Kundasang War Memorial

Kinabalu Park

 

After that, we went back to the hotel and check out. Next station is Kota Kinabalu yaw! We arrived KK at 2pm and check in at Marina Court, Promenade Apartment. Sangat recommended. We have 3 bedrooms, a living hall and kitchen. Selesa for big family like us. Sampai je lepak tidur jap and had our dinner later that night near pasar philipine.

Gaya comel kami 4 beranak

 

Day 3 - KK - Gaya Market - Manukan Island
We are lucky because we had the chance to visit Gaya Market that only have on Sunday. The trip was fun. Tak shopping apa pun, cuma tengok all the stuffs there. Dari pokok2 ke pets ke buahan ke barang kraf, semua ada. My mum la excited shopping.

Gaya Street Market

 

Tengah hari tu, my parents were undecided whether or not we go to the island. Pandai my sister semua bodek and in the end, we all pergi island. Like yayy! It is definately a must thing to do while in Sabah. We went to Manukan Island from Jesselton Jetty Point. Bila sampai je, rasa kagum sangat. The water is crystal clear! Snorkling terbaik lah! The local there are extremely friendly (and some of them handsome too :P), so they willing to show us the underwater world and stuff. I penakut, so pergi dekat2 je. My sister take the chance to explore the other side. Tapi dekat2 je pun dah sangat puas hati. We can see the fish swimming and seaweed menari-nari. Terasa macam explore titanic you. Baru snorkling dah excited. Belum lagi scuba diving. Haha.

Manukan Island

 

Petang tu balik dah lepak gila. We had our dinner at pasar malam and the seafood is cheap and fresh. Puas hati jugak. Haha. Sotong, udang, ikan bakar berlambak-lambak. Lucky kedai yang kitaorang makan tu sedap. Alhamdullilah.

Jesselton Jetty Point

Like the night before, after makan, cuci mata dekat pasar malam yang jual brooch pearl semua. Again, my mum lah orang paling bahagia time ni.

Day 4 - KK - Full swing shopping
Flight kitaorang petang. So pagi tu, lepas makan, terus pergi pasar philipine. Mama borong rantai, gelang and brooch mutiara. Ayah pulak borong ikan bilis, ikan masin and stuffs. Dah penat, rehat dekat hotel before checkout.

Terasa macam night at museum.

 

Later, we went to Sabah Museum. Pun best weyh. Muzium je kot. Tapi memang bestlah. My fav part at the museum is the audio visual on the education for the native in early days of Independence Day. There is funny part, where I feel like watching chaplin because of the black and white film.

That is the last place we visit after we check in for flight back home. And it is a bless that we were having a good family time together. Alhamdullilah.

*Pictures taken from my sis. Mine was corrupted. Wuuu.. Sedih...

 Kesimpulannya... Sabah best bah!

Career advise much?

Lesson learn. Just some reminder to myself on career advise.

1. Be a details person. Check, recheck and recheck before you submit proposal paper, communication, presentation, etc. Check even to the tiniest details, like date, numbers, content, data, etc.

2. Always confirm with your superior/boss before you proceed to the next action.

3. Don't delay/procrastinate. When people ask information from you, give to them asap if you have the access to the information.

4. Plan your work. Prioritize which task is important. Always set the dateline for each task.

5. Have listing of things-to-do and action taken worksheet. Prepare on your table and you're ready to go.

6. Read, research and share. Find out how other company did it their way and get some idea on how to improve yours.

7. Build network. Be confidence and have good relationship with all the staff, even the tea-lady. You will never know when you need their help.

8. Learn something new everyday and be knowledgeable. Have enthusiasm when you know something new.

8. Work hard, be sincere and everything will fall into places, InshaaAllah. Remain positive when things turn sour and believe good things will happen. Have faith in Allah.

This is a very general advise that I should remind myself because I make mistakes sometime. Let's climb the career ladder people!